Mustard and Mayo

There are two kinds of people in this world; mustard people and mayo people.  Mayonnaise is fatty and rich.  Mustard, on the other hand, is strong and bitter.  It’s a condiment that bites back, it’s like the Mike Tyson of condiments (minus the face tattoo, I feel like Mustard has more sense than that). 

 

I am a mayo person, and I like all the other trappings that go with it; ranch dressing, ice cream, butter, foie gras.  And not only do I have a serious love for the fatty and the sweet, I have a serious aversion to bitter foods.  I don’t like mustard much at all.  I mean, it has its moments but overall not a fan.  I also don’t like vinegar.  I don’t care for coffee unless it’s been girl-i-fied, otherwise far too bitter.  I don’t like the taste of alcohol either, which actually works out well for me.

In addition to there being people who like mayo and mustard, there are also people who are like mayo and mustard.  Some people are fat and happy when it comes to life, yet there are others who no matter what happens they have something to be bitter about.  If you prefer eating mustard over mayo that is fine, and probably better for your waistline.  But if you prefer to live like mustard, always bitter, upset, or complaining, that is not fine.  That hurts you and the people around you.  And if you are a Christian there is no excuse to be a Debbie Downer all the time if you have the hope of Jesus in your life.  So feel free to snack on the mustard, but live life like mayo.

And don’t even get me started on ketchup.